In this first-person narrative Sophia Patricia Calculli DeYoung, a senior student studying business administration at the ÍƼöÐÓ°ÉÔ´´, tells Nevada Today about her experience studying abroad in the University Studies Abroad Consortium’s (USAC) Verona, Italy program.
People fail to realize how challenging it is to study abroad. Don’t get me wrong, those big bright smiles you see on my social media in Paris, Budapest and Vienna are real and true, but there were also tears, lonely nights and a yearning for the life I knew before going abroad.
The reality of my new, exciting life in Verona, Italy, was that I was now in a time zone nine hours ahead — and at least a 20-hour travel day back — of my home, family and friends. While my study abroad program was 111 days of light, passion and wonder, it also meant missed birthdays, college milestones, holidays, gamedays and other moments with friends and partners. And that’s just the start.
Picture this: It was Friday and the first weekend of study abroad. We had the day off because we were taking a group field trip to Lake Garda, and my friends and I extended the trip through the weekend. I thought, “A perfect beach getaway in ITALY! What could be any better than this?”
At 7 a.m., I woke up to my alarm going off. I picked up my phone and there was a message from back home. It was terrifying, uncertain news: there was an emergency back home.
I immediately felt 100 different emotions. It really sunk in that I moved 5,326 miles — a whole ocean and continent away from my home — but now I was dealt a card that I didn’t know how to play. I was upset because it was four days into study abroad. I just started my new life and hit my reset button in college. I had been terrified of leaping into such an adventure, but I was also exhilarated … and now I suddenly felt unable to do it.
Then came the questions: Do I go home? Do I betray myself and quit something I worked on putting together for over a year? Am I selfish to stay? What am I going to tell my roommates who saw my face and heard my cries when I opened my phone, who can also hear me hyperventilate on the balcony right now? How do I open up to these three random girls I just met? Will they accept me or judge me? Will they be supportive or dismissive? How do I get on a bus and go on a field trip to Lake Garda with my classmates in an hour when it is beyond obvious that I have been bawling my eyes out since the second I woke up?
The biggest question of all, though, was: Why do I not have the support system that I know and need right now, especially when I need it most?
It was a matter of seconds for these questions to flood through my mind. I was overwhelmed with uncertainty and fear and there was no rule book or someone to guide me on how to navigate the things taking over my life. I was a mess, I had no answers, I felt alone and at the start, there was nothing I could do about it.
Time went on, I kept to myself, and the dust settled (somewhat) surrounding the emergency back home.
I slowly started to open up to my roommates about what I had been going through. This was the turning point for me. Finally letting my feelings show was huge, and it was what I needed to do from the start. Although I was scared and nervous, they held my hand along the way and helped me stand up. Because of their kindness and care, it helped me realize that there were also 24 other students in my program who were not only struggling with moving abroad, but who were also facing similar, unspoken challenges. Finding these similarities and knowing I was not alone made it so much easier for me to be me.
I was no longer nervous or scared, I felt free, and I especially felt like I was truly me for the first time in my life.
Every memory from studying abroad can be traced back to having someone there waiting to hug me and tell me that it was going to be okay; or to smile, laugh and skip with me down the streets along the Adgie River. When I found frustration in the language challenges and being understood, they were right there to help me find the words. When I was laughing so hard I was crying, they were there, too. When it felt like my entire world was going to shatter into pieces (which happened more than once, might I add), they were right there to glue me back together.
I truly hit the jackpot with the people in my program, and I am beyond lucky (and so grateful) to have had such a tight knit, loving and accepting group. I owe part of the success of my study abroad to myself for showing up and completing something of this magnitude, but more importantly, I owe it to the group of people I had standing around me, cheering me on. We saw and spent our best days together as well as some of our worst. Time moved so fast in Europe, but we created a bond thicker than blood. We became protective of each other, our hearts and our feelings — it was like we had known each other for years, but we had just met. Letting my guard down was the scariest part of studying abroad — allowing others to see the real me and my problems terrified me — but truth be told I was handed some of the most love and support that I have ever felt in my life.
To anyone considering going abroad for a term, I do not think anyone can truly prepare you for the impact that studying abroad will have on you and your life. However, I want to note how pivotal it is for you to trust in yourself and your newfound people. They are your family and will be a part of it forever.
I have never had a brighter smile on my face than when I traveled abroad. I have never felt more confident in myself than in my times abroad. In the times I walked the streets of Paris by myself thinking, “I did it, I made it, and it was through my own hard work and dedication that I got to this point.”
And I did it damn well. You are met with some of the best, most personally fulfilling and progressive moments in your life while abroad, but I also want to shine light on the fact that it is OK to find it emotionally challenging and difficult. If there is no rain, there will be no flowers. Since coming home, more than a year ago, there is not a day that goes by that I do not think about Italy, study abroad, my best friends and how it has truly impacted my life for the better. I would do it a million times over if I could — the amazing, the not-so-good times and every single moment in between. Studying abroad opened a gateway to the world for me, and because of that (and the people along the way), I have found passion, love and have gotten to travel the world to see my best friends. At the end of the day, all I have left to say is, what do you have to lose? Absolutely nothing. Study abroad, challenge yourself, and put yourself out there and you will go far. Travel the big wide world and the most glorious of opportunities will present themselves to you. Your life is what you make of it, it relies solely on you, so make it big and make it good.
ÍƼöÐÓ°ÉÔ´´ the author
Sophia Patricia Calculli DeYoung is currently in her senior year at the ÍƼöÐÓ°ÉÔ´´ pursuing a business administration degree with an emphasis in management and marketing. She is set to graduate in the Spring of 2025 and plans to move to Spain to work as a teaching assistant in a secondary education setting. When not in the classroom, you can find her planning future travel back to Europe and around the world.
